Monday, October 29, 2012

Running on empty

Hi, nice to see you. How you feeling? You hungry? Today I missed lunch. I was real hungry. I wrote the word EMPTY onto my grumbly tummy. 

My friend Fat Dan, who didn't miss lunch, told me that it was too political.

I lifted his shirt and wrote FULL on his.
That's all for tonight, it's not good to blog on an empty stomach.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Nothing to white home about

Hey mate, the other month I was in an exhibition at the VCA titled 56 Shades of White. The catch with the show was that all of the works were entirely the colour white.

When making a piece for the show I suppose I could've used the opportunity to comment on racism, but instead I went with something a little cleaner.

I made a bar of soap out of clay, placed it onto a soap holder and installed it onto a window that looks like it belongs in a shower.
Once installed I removed a hair from my body and attached it to the soap.
To complete the installation I constructed a square of tiles on the floor.
Here's some dirty photos of my buddy Dan soaking up the work.
Good clean fun.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

The cycle of life (Part two)

Hey peddling enthusiasts, so maybe you remember my sculpture of a Melbourne Share Bike from the Funny Games exhibition I was in earlier this year. (If not, here's the link).

Well I made another one. 

I made this Melbourne Shared Bike using my homeboy Jock's ridiculous bike that's been welded out of two and a half regular bikes.

Here it is riding high over the other Melbourne Share Bikes. 
And here it is with my homegirl Amy.

Here's the bike next to the bike my homegirl Amy usually rides.
I've made three of these things now.
How rad would it be to see heaps of these pretend Melbourne Share Bikes riding round the streets? Send me an email ( if you'd consider letting me paint your bike. I'll probably do it for free.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Nice to meat you!

If hotdogs could talk I think we all know what they'd say;
The life-size dogs are acrylic on ceramic and made in 2012. 
These photos were all taken on my phone and underneath bad fluorescent lights, the same kind of lighting you might expect to see real hotdogs waiting under.

I put the dogs onto a wall at uni last night just to see how they'd look. 

It was late and everyone had gone home for dinner. The only person who happened to walk past my yummy welcome was a security guard, although when he did he was looking the other way.
I love the security guards at uni, but even still he made it clear that it was time for me to go.

To keep the hotdogs hot for my journey home I stopped by the microwave on the way out.
That's all I have to say really, I guess I'm feeling a bit like a hotdog myself, I just wanted to say hi.


Monday, October 08, 2012

Marking a Rothko

Hey so this smorning I read a tweet by Tim Wright saying that he just saw a Mark Rothko painting in Londons Tate Modern being defaced. Apparently the guy "calmly walked up, took out a marker and tagged it". The tweet had this image attached.
I don't know who Tim Wright is, but I was bombarded with his tweet as everyone kept retweeting it. In fact
at the time I'm writing this 444 people have retweeted it. 

The tweet seemed to be confirmed when the Tate Modern evacuated the public from their premises and closed the gallery. The tweet was soon officially confirmed by the BBC, and then later by the Tate Modern itself.

Immediately following Wrights tweet lots of media sources openly replied to Wright asking him for an interview, and then immediately after that Wright interviews were being retweeted., the first place I saw to request an interview and the first place I saw to have published one, "enhanced" Wrights original photo so that you could now read the text.
Someone named Greg Allen of claimed to have found that the vandel is some guy named Vladimir Umanets. Umanets apparently represents a movement known as "Yellowism".

Here is the Yellowism manifesto, sourced from

With this in mind, the tag enscribed on the supposedly 50 million pound 1958 Rothko painting; "Black on maroon", could now be understood to read as; 
About an hour ago Ben Quin of the Guardian claims to have spoken to "a guy who claims to have "improved" the Rothko at the Tate Modern today... He says he was following in the footsteps of Duchamp and that the Rothko will be worth a lot more as a result in the future".

Quin went on to write a Guardian article that read;
“I was expecting that the security at Tate Modern would take me straight away, because I was there and I signed the picture in front of a lot of people. There is video and cameras and everything, so I was shocked.”

“I didn’t destroy the picture. I did not steal anything. There was a lot of stuff like this before. Marcel Duchamp signed things that were not made by him, or even Damien Hirst.”

He said that he admired Rothko, describing him as one of the great figures in art of the last century, but added: “I don’t believe that what I have done is criminal. If the police are going to arrest me, then they are going to arrest me. I am OK with that.”

After this someone named Holy Knowlman tweeted that Vladimir Umanets is an anagram for "I'm true vandalism".

So far as I can tell no-one is yet to be charged for the crime. 

After reviewing surveliance footage the suspect is known to be a white male in mid twenties, which although matches Umanets' profile, also matches mine.

It's ok though, I have a solid aliby. There's no way it could've been me who defaced the Tate's Rothko, for you see at the time I was busy tagging the one at the National Gallery of Victoria.
While I'm being a reporter and giving you hot off the press inside scoops, I should tell you something else I found out today.

Apparently the NGV's Rothko painting, (pictured above), "Untitled (Red)" from 1958, was actually hung
upside down for five years. It wasn't until the conservation team X-rayed it that they realized that the signature was the wrong way up.
You heard it here first. Well, that's all for now. Thanks for tuning in to your six o'clock art news update. I'm Kenny Pittock. See you tomorrow.

And it was all yellow (Part one)

Hey so I already showed you the view from my home studio window here, but if you tilt your head at just the right angle, here's the view from my uni studio.
So that's Australian sculptor Ron Robertson-Swann's 1980 public sculpture Vault, or as it is generally known, the Yellow Peril

The Yellow Peril is notorious for being hated by the public, (apparently because of it's modernist form but probably much more so because it cost $70,000 of taxpayers money). 

Due to protesting the Yellow Peril only lasted from May until December in its original  commissioned location in Melbourne City Square before it was moved out of the way to Batman Park in 1981. 

The Yellow Peril stayed in Batman Park until 2002 when it was finally moved to the sandpit next to ACCA, (the Australian Center for Contemporary Art), where I get to enjoy it every time I look out my window.

Here's a drawing I did of the Peril on the 25th of August 2010 of a man getting a parking fine in front of it.
I've since seen this happen many, many times, and once or twice have been the one getting the fine myself.

After doing ten seconds of research into the Vault I've discovered that it was given its nickname, (because it was yellow and unwanted), after another Yellow Peril. This Yellow Peril refers to a time in the late 19th century when Chinese immigrants came in large numbers into many Western countries, most notably America. 

To quote wikipedias page on Yellow Peril, many Americans "believed that the mass immigration of Asians threatened white wages and standards of living".

So I don't know, I can't help but feel like maybe we shouldn't be calling Vault the Yellow Peril. It's pretty bad. Maybe we should call it the Yellow Meryl instead. Meryl is a much nicer and less racist name for the Vault.

Although if you really want to see a racist Yellow Peril then you should watch the video I'll be putting onto youtube later this week.

(If that's not a cliffhanger then I don't know what is).
(Subscribe to my youtube channel here).

Sunday, October 07, 2012

Having friends in high(lander) places

Hey music lover, last Thursday night my buddy Nelson Walkom, with Simon Lowther on bass, played a gig at the Highlander bar in Melbourne. It was so good. Nelson is so good. If I were into guys I'd probably be his groupie.

Here's a recording of his performance of Nightly News, (the song I wrote the lyrics for).
That's my best bud Tom you can hear sitting next to me.

The whole gig was gnarly. And I don't use the word 'gnarly' flippantly. (I also don't use the word 'flippantly' flippantly).

Although the layout of the venue wasn't quite as intimate as the Open Studio gig I talked about here, there were heaps of people there on Thursday. Here's a photo I found on facebook that someone I don't know took from the night.
As well as being one of my very good pals, Nelbow is genuinely one of my favourite musicians, and so it's very exciting to be out in a hip bar watching him sing my hip lyrics.

I'll be sure to let you know when Nels next gig is, and when I do you really ought to come along. In the meantime though here's a photo of Nelson catching a meteor and saving the planet.

Thursday, October 04, 2012

Two friends having a Gaytime

Oh hey, great to see you. The VCA Mini Film Fest was two days ago.
My friend Sam, who organised the event, asked me if I'd like to contribute a film.  As I'm good buddies with her brother Dan I decided to gather up all the photos I could find of the two of us and make something using them.

It's called Friend.
I didn't tell Dan, or anybody else, about the film, and so my homage to my pal was a great surprise when it premiered up on the big screen. It was pretty funny.

When all the video art was finished screening Dan and I went to the park and ate Gaytimes.
Gaytimes are the best.